Here we are
by lightmypath
Summary: When the weight of being a superhero is getting too heavy, who'll be there to carry that weight along with him?


Here we are.

It's just you and me. We're like the sea and the air. I need you whenever I feel difficulties to breathe, whenever I need a comforting hand on my shoulder to tell me that everything is okay and if it's not, it will be. You support me to do the unthinkable and still, even with that unexpected turn of events, learned to enjoy it. Feelings slowly drip from my body, making it an unbearable experience to go through on my own, but you creating these marks that express my emotions makes it less unbearable. Even in my dreams, your voice seems to echo through the air, grabbing me underneath the surface just in time before I could drown. They say you have a bad influence on me, that I should say goodbye to you, so I could erase you out of my mind and leave you for good, but who would be there to save me from this airless liquid when you're not there? Nobody would like to meet you, so we both agreed to keep this a secret, just like being Danny Phantom is a secret. Two hidden identities are a challenge, only is being a ghost a coincidence; you are a choice.

The walk to school was as usual and went by like a breeze. The mornings? Those felt like a heavy weight was attached to my foot which prevented me from moving further than a few steps. First, Jazz. Even with the appreciation I felt towards her but never showed, she could be a hand full to deal with. It made it easier to share at least one of my secrets with her, but I bet that she can't even meet you without keeping an eye on me afterwards. Although my mind begged to read through Jazz' psychological books to know more about my actions, I denied admitting my thoughts and pretended like everything I do is normal; it's supposed to be like that. Why did I feel so lonely when it was supposed to be normal? I couldn't ignore the glances she shot at me every now and then, which got to my nerves at some point. After asking her to talk with me, we entered her bedroom and I placed myself on the chair that sat behind her desk, Jazz finding her spot on her bed.

After a few minutes of silence, she decided to break the ice. "So, what would you like to talk about Danny?" Sighing, whether to choose between you or my annoyance, I went for the second option. "Jazz, I notice the glances you sent me through both breakfast and dinner. I bet if we sat together for lunch in school, you'd give me those glances as well. Just spit it out if there's something going on that bothers you." Before I realized what I had said, I closed my mouth shut before more frustration could slip through my lips. " _Just spit it out if there's something going on that bothers you?_ Isn't that what you should do as well before you give that advice to others?"

She came to me and placed her hand on mine. The slightest thought sent a shiver through my spine and I yanked my hand away from hers. It shouldn't be this way. I don't deserve this affection, surely not after what you've done to me. Sighing, Jazz placed her hand back on her knee and went on with the conversation. "Look, Danny, whatever you're going through, you can always talk to me. I'm just worried. You refuse to talk to me whenever I try to, you're extremely quiet and if you talk, it's either as if someone has stolen your happiness or you get mad when nobody even told you something rude or hurting. What's going on?" _As if someone has stolen your happiness_. You could say that.

"Nothing is going on. I'm completely fine, see? Just your normal, typical brother who accidentally is a ghost as well." I left her eye contact, looking down at my hands placed on my own knees. My heart seemed to beat faster each second she watched me at every angle possible from her point of view. "Danny," she stopped through her sentence, thinking about how to form her words, "as long as you think you're fine, it's okay. But if I see your lies cross the line, I must act. I hope you understand that." And with that sentence being said, I left my spot and went directly to the door. Nervously looking back at my sister, I could see her doubts shining through her eyes but tried to forget the sight.

That night was filled with both concerns and relief. _She let me go so easily, but why?_ She knew I was telling lies, but how? Did she know what was going on but wanted to wait until I accepted defeat and told her myself, just like when she found out I am Danny Phantom? Was she going to hunt behind me herself or ask Sam and Tucker behind my back? What was going on?

Entering class too late due my troubled mind, I dropped my backpack next to my desk and let myself collapse on my chair. "Mr. Fenton, you know the rules." Sighing heavily, I searched for my journal and went to Mr. Lancers desk. This would be a different story. How was I'm planning to tell mom and dad? I could hear their disappointment already eating at the back of my mind, but I slowly shoved it backwards once again. Apart from Jazz, my parents were an obstacle as well each morning. An overprotective woman matched with an obsessive ghost-hunting man (which, by the way, my mom is as well) were doomed to end up as an unordinary family. Although I love my mom a lot, she keeps a close eye on me, even more than Jazz already did. Not to mention the time she wanted to spend with me apart from my parents' latest ghost-inventions still had to involve ghosts. That leaves me to my dad, the last person I should be worried about if it comes to Danny Fenton. Because he was so involved and focused on hunting the one and only Danny Phantom, which made hiding worse than it already was before, Danny Fenton didn't get as much attention as my ghost-half did. Although my parents felt extremely guilty about this fact, I didn't mind at all. I already had enough attention on my plate from both school and being a ghost, that the small amount of alone time I had as Danny Fenton was a pleasant gift. Knowing I disappointed them day in day out with my slipping grades and my never-ending detention notes in my journal made me believe that the pain they wanted to blast at Danny Phantom was the punishment Danny Fenton deserved.

With the eleventh note written in the communication box, I tried to get rid of that nagging feeling that this needed to end. Class went by as a blur. Even with all the words I could hear and see written on the blackboard, I couldn't process any information coming from it. Once the bell rang, I could hear Sam and Tucker talk right behind me, but I couldn't help myself to join the conversation. **You keep telling me to act like you always act, but I started to forget how I acted before you**. Did I really change that much? I couldn't remember a lock shift, except for Danny Phantom of course. People kept wondering what had changed. From being an eagerly learning student to a student who didn't seem to care at all, from being a person who was determined to become an astronaut in the future to a person who has written failure all over his body, from being a person who could accept some detentions to a person who got mentally sick of it, from being a boy who loved eating food to a boy who felt nauseous every time he had to face the thought of swallowing nutrients; it left people with various reasons as to why things changed so quickly.

Arriving in front of the door, I paused before I was able to push it open. What should I tell my parents this time? As fun as being a superhero is, the consequences were just building themselves up, on the edge of falling apart. **You force me to smile through the pain though, to pretend that every movement my body was planning to make would be awfully hurting me, so I did as you told me**. Opening the door silently, I saw my mom resting her feet on the table in front of our cough, working on another invention that was supposed to hurt m-…, no, supposed to hurt Danny Phantom. Nervously making my way towards her, Maddie's concentrated expression changed to a small smile. "Hey honey, how was school?" Trying to ignore my sudden shaking legs, I took my journal out of my backpack, leaving her question unanswered. Showing non-verbally my journal, she placed her latest invention next to her and grabbed it out of my hands. Sighing, she lifted her eyes to me, her eyes filled with the emotion I prepared myself for: disappointment. "Danny, we talked about this last time. If you don't change this attitude quickly, we have to take the situation in our own hands." She autographed Mr. Lancers note and shoved the journal towards me on the table. My heart began throbbing with guilt and I slowly felt my hands shaking along with my legs, taking the book and placing it back in my backpack. "Your father and I have been discussing this already, and we think it's for the best if we'll have a talk with Mr. Lancer one of the following days. We can't keep autographing these detentions without knowing the cause of your absence in class and ignoring this situation afterwards." Not daring to look her in the eyes, I kept my focus on my shoes, thinking of any believing reason why I was late at class so many times. Would they believe me if I said I needed to go to the bathroom? No, I wouldn't leave each lesson just to use the bathroom. Think. Maybe… I could be having trouble sleeping? Which, in fact, wasn't a lie, but it would cause too many questions afterwards. I didn't go to bed in time because of the amount of homework which causes me to fall asleep in the previous lesson? That wasn't a full lie either. I did fall asleep in class, but not for that reason. If my parents brought this up to Mr. Lancer, he'd know I was lying and it'll blow my mask in a matter of seconds.

Not knowing how long I was lost in my thoughts, I could see my mom darting her eyes at mine, confusion and worry clearly visible on her face. "Danny, do you maybe have anything you'd like to share? Any reason why these detentions are a never-ending circle?" She put her face in her hands, still focused on me while I hid my shaking hands behind my back. Inhaling deeply and slowly letting the inhaled air leave my lungs, I prayed that this conversation would end well. "I don't sleep well lately?" It came out more as a question than a statement, which raised a brow by my mom. After drinking a small amount of her water, she leaned back on the cough, her arms resting beside her. "How come? Do you have any nightmares or just too little time to sleep?" "Just too little time to sleep I suppose." I answered back. Admitting I have nightmares would just cause more trouble, which I didn't want to deal with. Deciding to rest my backpack on my shoulders and my hands placed in my pockets, I tried to end this chapter by leaving the conversation. Before I could do so, I felt a hand on my hair, softly brushing through the black locks. "Make sure to go to bed earlier then. Please don't let this happen again." I could hear her say. Her voice thick with sadness, I gave her a small, reassuring smile before leaving the room. There I left her, her eyes catching a last glance of mine before I closed the door right behind me.


End file.
